“Blessed are those who can laugh at themselves, for they shall never cease to be amused.” ~ Anon.
I’m staying in a Very Nice Dorm on the campus of Schreiner University in Kerrville for the Writers’ League of Texas‘ Summer Retreat. My job is to write. No classes, just write.
Here is what I’ve accomplished since arriving Sunday afternoon.
(I believe I’ve mentioned I sometimes have a little trouble walking? Like from parking lots to buildings? If I didn’t, I would be bopping all over campus and wouldn’t have anything to put in this post.)
Sunday
Registered
Saw doe wandering around dorms
Didn’t know where camera was so didn’t stop for picture of doe
Hauled provisions into the dorm
Noticed it was as hot as . . . I thought it would be
Drove to cafeteria; parked in nearby lot (very nearby)
Walked from lot to cafeteria; on the way, noticed my back was out
Considered possibility of walking to orientation
Skipped orientation
Said to myself, “I should not have retreated this summer.”
Drove into town for more provisions
Couldn’t make room key work
Threw two sets of keys down onto the walk as hard as I could, set my tote down carefully because it had breakable stuff in it, and swore I would go home the next morning to my husband, who does everything for me, and my cats, who don’t
Made room key work
Crashed in room
Monday, before leaving room
Got out of bed
Noticed my back was still out
Loaded totes for day of writing at Junkin Worship Center
Lost my room key
Found my room key
Lost my car key
Found my car key
Divested totes
(Do I really need my Kindle? No. Do I really need my camera? No. Do I really need eight pens? No. Do I really need three bottles of orange juice and a bunch of breakfast bars? Only if I want to stay upright. )
Lost my room key.
Found my room key.
Lost and found several other things.
Monday, after leaving room
Drove to WLT office; parked in nearest lot
Walked to office; took emergency contact info to director because I missed orientation
Lost my room key
Walked back to car
Became traditionally hungry for the first time in over three years
Considered walking to cafeteria
Drove into town to Burger King
Considered possibility of legally adopting my massage therapist
Lost my handicap parking permit
Parked in regular space at Burger King, no big deal
Bought Whopper, Coke, and Hershey shake; didn’t want Hershey shake but was unhappy about parking permit
Found my room key in my pocket
Put Hershey shake in freezer at dorm
Was still hungry
Ate remaining half of Whopper
Found my handicap parking permit
Flopped on couch, revised a few lines of manuscript
Regretted eating remaining half of Whopper
Fell asleep
Skipped buffet
Said if this walking thing keeps up, I will spend the whole week in my room writing, because that’s what I came to do, and the room is Very Nice, and the A/C works beautifully
Tuesday before leaving room:
Got out of bed
Noticed my back was better
Didn’t lose anything
Tuesday after leaving room
Drove to mid-campus and parked in lot across from Moody Science Building
Walked to Junkin Worship Center Quiet Writing Room
Collapsed onto couch
Found my handicap parking permit in tote bag
Emailed director re giving her permit numbers so she could testify for me in court, or of my calling campus security
Emailed husband for numbers on license plate because I remember only letters
Decided paying $500 – $750 in fine plus court costs a small price for not walking back to parking lot
WLT rep came from across room and walked permit to car, bless her heart, and I mean that most sincerely
And here I am.
Please note that none of the adventures listed here has anything at all to do with the Writers’ League of Texas. The director offered to have me golf-carted (that’s what they do) where I needed to go, but I can drive and park just about anywhere. My problem is getting from parking lots to doors, so I declined. The League and the Retreat are doing just fine. It’s all me, me, me.
I’m going to stay in the Junkin Center drinking orange juice and eating breakfast bars (horrid but convenient) till it closes and later try to make it to the dining hall.
When I started chemo, I vowed I would not excuse any of my shortcomings on chemo brain or chemo body or anything else related to it.
I might un-vow that. There’s probably some truth in it, and it’s much better than blaming everything on age.
Now, PLEASE don’t pity me or say you’re sorry about my trials and tribulations.
Because, folks, it’s all material.
*
Okay. I’ve caught my breath. Now I have to stop this and do the writing I came here to do.
This is a photo of the Butt-Holdsworth Memorial Library in Kerrville, Texas. Round, two stories. I used to come here for library conferences. The interior is beautiful.
Kathy Waller 